People arranged one an initial purpose of lobola should be to generate a healthier dating between one or two in addition to their respective families. Eliza, a beneficial 55-year-dated woman within the a proper ilies to one another so they should have a good relationship and i is always to reside in brand new family you to definitely my children can ascertain.” Eliza’s comments and additionally point to brand new specialized recognition of a romance you to definitely lobola will bring. Such transform increases the protection that ladies feel since informed me because of the Khana, who has been living with their own lover (zero lobola) for almost ten years:

With no formal detection of your own union in addition to relationships anywhere between the 2 household you to definitely lobola provides, women are will remaining in a condition from liminality and suspicion because revealed by the Priscilla, an effective thirty-six-year-dated woman that has been coping with their own spouse (zero lobola) to possess 18 decades:

If he is most in love, he will be spend lobola in order for both dad and mom can become fulfilled and you may feminine also can end up being satisfied that they’re very being in their own personal domestic. However if my people did not spend lobola, it means that we am perhaps not complete and [in-laws] dislike me personally. Read more